scared to death, no reason why do whatever to get me by

take me home, say goodbye don't follow. really, really good song off of a tiny cd by alice in chains called sap. if you haven't heard this song, i suggest an immediate download and then slap yourself twice for your negligence. if you are familiar with alice in chains, you know the lead singer was lane staley. there was another guy jerry cantrell in the band who was tired of lane's condition(always loaded), so he began to sing on tracks. this way if lane went out, they had another plan. on that song dont follow, jerry sings the first two verses, lane does the back-up vocals. this is already pretty embarrasing for jerry i'm sure. he's up there singing his heart out and lane from the background makes him sound like an idiot. as if that wasn't enough, lane has the last verse of the song and really takes it home. he one ups jerry so bad. just listen to it. i can see lane standing behind jerry during the recording pointing and laughing at his weak attempt at lead. anyways, the birthday was good. i had wings with some friends and then went home. it was nice. today puts me within 8 days of one year sobriety. its been fairly easy for me. i guess things were so bad that i cant see going back to that life ever again. i have to work tomorrow and then catch a train on saturday, i know, they still use trains. i was surprised too. so, i'll be in lovely jackson, miss. on saturday, ride back with my sister to laplace on sunday, then the westbank on christmas day. whew, allot of moving around. there is a few people i plan on seeing when i get to laplace that i haven't seen in about a year, maybe more. i'm really looking forward to seeing them. i hope to see dog, cuz, jenkins, among others. i'll see my cousin who moved to n.c. last year. its weird making an appearance, i almost think they'll look at me and think to themselves,"he's on steroids." or, "he probably still gets loaded" whatever man, whatever, its probably just my crazy head telling me they'd think that. i could care less if they did. thats the good thing about me now, i am so sure of myself and i know that i am doing the best i can at everything i do, so if they judge or dont trust me, alright, thats about them, i'm doing a pretty good job over here. this blog isnt very good cause i'm at a friends house and cant collect my thoughts very well while talking, so if you got a problem with it then you can stick it in your bum-bum, and not my cat. hopefully, my neighbors internet will start working better so i can sit at home and write some stuff. much love to my peeps, holler